Artificial Cheese

Mystic Jewel carpenter’s tool, parochial school.  Rhymezone.com. deal with it.

My old friend Fidel Castro has returned from the brink of death once more, just to hold up the newspaper and condemn the minimal efforts that the United States is making towards a better future for the United States.  Castro’s target?  Corn.

Castro claims that 3 billion people are going to die because the US is using corn for fuel instead of feeding hungry people.  This is because there is obviously a fixed amount of corn on this planet and we can’t waste it on efforts to save the Earth against a manifestation of Kevin Costner’s Waterworld.

Car’s don’t run on pessimism, and they won’t run on irony either when Cuba becomes the next Atlantis.  Oddly enough, they do run on corn.  It just appears to me that Castro is throwing claims left and right so he can get some ‘told-you-so’s after he dies, and a brief remake of Weekend at Bernie’s.

Seriously, Castro’s prediction is very narrow sighted.  Predicting the future cannot be done by focusing on one simple cause-and-effect relationship.  Less Corn = More Starvation.  There are other factors that will increase the world’s overall food supply, like Frankenfood, which brings with it another set of ethical and unpredictable health concerns.

But while we’re on the topic of cause and effect, how about Global Warming = Less Corn?

If there is any reason for concern, its that we are relying on corn to prevent global warming.  This is like burning both ends of a candle.  We are using a resource to solve a problem that will eradicate the resource; Corn will disappear due to the effects of global warming, and we’re trying to remedy global warming using corn.

I would recommend some solutions, but its just so much easier to blame George W.